Beyond the book's bio: Connecting my writing to me

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not."

~ The Lorax, a Dr. Suess book, made movie.

This quote is the core of this particular blog and represents the seriousness of the idea behind my writing in general. But first, a few fun facts about me...

I was born and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area, California. Moving a total of twelve times when I was younger, I also have lived in the states of Ohio and Hawaii. I’m an only child and come from a long line of military servicemen. God Bless our service men and women of the United States Military! Growing up I always loved to travel, do anything outdoors, dance, discover my next favorite movie, and my best-loved being cars and animals, I developed a life-long devotion for both. Wanting to know the ins and outs with cars and surrounding myself with a variety of animals, continuously wanting to learn more. I've had everything from rabbits to birds, lizards to fish, dogs to horses, my personal favorite being - horses. I sat on my first horse at three, and pretty much never got off (of course, slightly exaggerating here, but not by too much). My first job at the age of sixteen was giving riding lessons to children five and up in exchange for leasing a horse, then leading to owning my first horse. My fondness for this majestic animal took me to later competing in many different categories in English riding. Learning not only the competitive side of the sport, but also the responsibly side of taking care of another life form (heart and soul), dependent on me - competitive horseback riding isn't just a sport, it's a lifestyle - nonstop. Two beings creating a sync of one.

Through every stage of growing up you could find me writing, anything from poetry to short stories, and eventually I worked towards becoming a published author. It’s a very challenging industry (I've received hundreds of rejections over the years), so in the meantime I got into hotel hospitality, working my way up into various managerial roles, all while pursuing my writing career. It was going to happen, and it wasn’t a matter of “if”, it was a matter of when. I worked for two major hotel chains (Sofitel Hotels & Resorts and Starwood Hotels, Resorts & Spas), totaling almost twelve years, before becoming a full-time author. And here I am - four books later! An international author working out of Wall Street in New York with my publisher while currently living in Las Vegas, Nevada with my husband, son, and parents. Being an author is a constant work in progress (I believe we can always improve and be better in our professions), and I couldn't be happier, knowing the sweat and tears I've endured getting to this point.

A huge part of my personality comes from being rooted with a major focus on family, and that principle is found behind a lot of my writing. I am Italian, German, and Russian. While I grew up honoring traditions from all my nationalities, I was mostly raised around my Italian side. We're a large family originating from Sicily and Naples, Italy, involved in each other's lives, passionate and comically animated when talking, and taught to cook in the kitchen as soon as we could walk. Where our parties get louder as the night goes on, not because of drinking or partying, but because one person is trying to be heard over the next until the atmosphere becomes one loud talking fest. All pretty much sums up the characteristics of our heritage - passionate, loving, supportive, family-oriented, talk-with-our-hands, and definitely need-to-be-heard, people. There's a lot of love that's shared through our family's togetherness, and the sense of support with having each other's back is evident.

Another large part of my identity, and if you've been following my blog, and or my social media posts, I'm sure you can tell by now I'm a bit of an old soul, but with a modern twist. I love classic movies and T.V shows just as much as I do current entertainment (anywhere from romance to horror, from comedy to cooking shows). I believe in romance and chivalry (romance book in the making- where Casablanca meets 50 Shades of Grey). I enjoy the music and artists from the 50's, 60's, and 70's (i.e: The Penguins, The Temptations, Dion, Tina Turner throughout her career, most of the Dirty Dancing soundtrack, and some bands during their career like ZZ Top, The Black Crows, and The Rolling Stones) equally the same as I love hip hop and rap (i.e: Nelly, 50 Cent, Flo Rida, Nicky Minaj, Eminem, Notorious B.I.G).

I would say being an old soul has kept me grounded in the sense of a classic love in all things, with tradition laced in, and focusing on the simplicity of happiness - old school, pre-high-tech days. While continuously integrating my thinking into today's day and age. It's a fun combination, once I got the hang of it!

Also, a huge factor in my life, and as you know, the core of Laughing Out of Context is humor - I love to laugh, always have enjoyed the true medicine of life - laughter. So, when you're reading a novel of mine, you'll see the humor weaved throughout. Yes, even in my upcoming horror novel. I have to always have those couple characters who are quick-witted that keeps even the most serious of plots lighthearted at times. There's definitely an art to it, and many say it's unconventional for that genre. But I know it can be done. As I like to say: "My story, my way."

Throughout my poetry and self-help books, as well as my novels, you will find both classically time-honored wording and scenarios mixed in with an edgy side of today's modernity. When you really stop to read between the lines and plots, you will find my personality, core values, and background in everything I write. There's intent behind all of my wording, to always tell more, and teach more, there are multiple hidden gems to be found, when looking.

I now want to take a moment (as the basis of this blog, and Lorax quote) to temporarily put the fun facts aside, to write about the one core reason that ultimately makes me who I am - encompassing my personality, drives me to achieve what I want in life, fuels my writing in self-help, and brings everything together with how I personify myself.

I have a difficult part of my past to bring up, not because I have a hard time talking about it (it’s quite the opposite), but because not many people know. In fact, my story has contributed to helping many succeed in life when I have shared it. There's usually hesitation with anyone when bringing up a challenging part of their past to others, simply because they're afraid of how people might react. That is the reason behind what has always made me hesitant. However, I've decided to integrate my story as part of a small sub-plot in my romance novel (my true story will be at the end), to help others who've had similar struggles as me, or are currently struggling, and feel they have no one to talk to or help them.

Deep breath…this is a big one…here goes nothing.

In short, until my book is released:

If you have not heard of the book, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia, or are not familiar with the author, Marya Hornbacher, this is a memoir about her battle with the two eating disorders. The book highlighted two girls as well who suffered from anorexia and bulimia, and how they both overcame them, not only surviving, but going on to thrive in life. One of those two girls in this book was me. Names were changed for privacy.

Even though I work with the fantastic organization, National Eating Disorders Association, NEDA, to raise awareness, and work to get people the help they need, I 've never publicly talked about that very dark time in my teenage years. However, I know that what I have been through with anorexia and bulimia is relatable to a countless number of people - children and adults alike (currently 9% of the U.S population), and success stories are invaluable in helping others fight this awful illness. Being relatable comforts in the power of knowing there’s strength in overcoming your life’s challenges. So, as hard as it is to step outside of my comfort zone, creating a huge vulnerability, I will be telling my story as part of my future book to shed more light on this under-publicized topic. I believe in the message behind the quote from The Lorax - I want to help make things better (and healthier). I hope to be able to save even more people from the eating disorder’s darkness by telling the challenges I went through and my process to success.

For those who've seen one of my mottos that I post from time to time, “When someone says I can’t, I turn around and show them I can” all derived from my battle with anorexia and bulimia. A sneaky illness constantly telling you, you can’t (in every aspect of life), but, after spending several months hooked up to a heart monitor and on bed rest in the amazing Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital Stanford, California, missing Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year’s, and my high school senior prom, and then the subsequent years of mentally and physically recovering, I finally turned around and showed the eating disorders I CAN. 

This is why you'll see the red heart symbol in a lot of my social media posts, books, etc, and most of what I use in my daily life - symbolizing the strength in bringing my heart (and body) back to health, and the fight I know it took to get to that point.

My past is also the reason I integrate a certain message about opinions/judgement into all my books and posts, in that: people will always have their own thoughts about you, some may say mean or rude things (the reality is, there are a certain amount of certifiably cruel people in this world), but also everyone's entitled to have different points of view, just do your best to shake off any negativity. Drown out the white noise. Because many people tend to judge someone off of what they know or see, not knowing what that person has truly been though. "Walk a mile in my shoes," is one of the best idioms in my opinion. It says the most about what humanity should embrace, with exemplifying more kindness and understanding that we all have been through something unpleasant at one time or another.

Knowing I fought off this illness let me know I can fight for anything in life, and turn, “No, you can’t” into, “Yes, I can”. Every individual is stronger than they think - you just need to search for that inner strength. And because of my past, I've worked with two children’s hospital organizations - St. Jude and Children’s Miracle Network Hospitals. I’ve seen what these remarkable organizations do for children and their families, and with having been on the recipient side of a children’s hospital, I want to help where I can, to get our children to be okay. Showing them, “Yes they can, too!”

When you have challenges in life, don't let them define who you are in a negative way, let those obstacles fuel a positive change, to enjoy life and be a guiding light to others.

Over 10,000 people die from an eating disorder every year, and almost 30 million people have suffered from an eating disorder at some point in their life. If you, or someone you know, might be struggling with an eating disorder and has questions, you can message me on one of my platforms, and I'll be more than happy to answer them for you!

Or go to nationaleatingdisorders.org for more information.

Never forget to stay true to who you are, and not live by what you think other people would like, and always remember to keep your identity integrated throughout every single chapter of your life’s journey.

Salute alla vita! Cheers to life!